We are officially one YEAR and counting! He has 11 more treatments left. This was huge! He is ready to be done!
This visit was different in that his BROTHER was able to go for the first time in 2+ years he has been able to join us to the CHEMO CLINIC! He was excited to show his brother many of the ins and outs of this place! TO Blake it was a mysterious place that Carson had fun at; he learned it wasn't as fun and wasn't as exciting as he had thought.
Counts were not good, this is the first time in since he entered maintenance that he has had to decrease and this time we stopped it all together until his counts could come up. and ANC of 410 is not a good thing, and we really need to be careful. BUT we will still live...
We visited Grandpa Dan, Sent him balloons, and cleaned up his resting place.
Carson got really backed up and wasn't feeling well.
He had a CT, the only kid I am sure the nurse has ever had ask for more contrast; she was shocked when he asked for more. I laughed and said he is on steroids. :)
We see the light we know it is coming soon. I can't wait to throw a party like no one has seen in celebration of him taking NO MORE CHEMO THERAPY!
Here is a insight on Childhood cancer awareness...
Day 3: The Fault in our Stars coined the term "cancer perks." It's aptly named. I have heard much backlash and many say "they are doing FUN, things I could NEVER do with my kids" Yes, childhood cancer has perks. And from the outside looking in, it may seem like these kids/families are showered with more gifts and recognition than they should be. But the thing to understand is that they have given up playing on playgrounds, swimming in public swimming pools, even trips to the grocery store. They can't go to school, Many can't run, are in pain (Carson for 2+ years now). Carson gave up a "good" Christmas that first year, having treatment on Christmas Eve. He struggles to be just like the rest of the kids. I as his mom know the full reality that cancer, or the treatment we are using could take his life.
As I know with many of my "cancer mom friends" I'd take a cure or prevention over Disney World ANY DAY!
Some organizations that have helped bless our family along the way,Children and the Earth, Inc., Mascot Miracles Foundation, Make-A-Wish Utah, Camp Hobé, Jessie Rees Foundation: Never Ever Give Up,Western Wishes, and Chemo Angel.
Dear New Cancer Mom,
I’m sorry. I am sorry that you are part of this group. I am sorry you now have the title of cancer mom. Your life has changed. In one split second your world just fell apart. Allow yourself to cry, it will make you feel better. Allow yourself to kick and scream and have a tantrum, let it take all your energy, because there are somedays that crying is all you can do for the day. The fog will lift, I promise. The feeling you get when you walk into a store or a restaurant, that feeling that everything is surreal, that you want to turn around and walk out because everyone in that place is happy and laughing, it will go away. In place of that, you will look at people that are constantly unhappy with their lives and remind them of how precious life is.
Stay positive, things do get better, but be a realist too. Don’t allow people to make you think that your anxiety and worry is not justified. It is. Your child was diagnosed with cancer. It’s a very scary world to be placed in. Watching your child go through this and watching other children, it’s not something you wish upon anyone….but when you witness your own child and all the other children continually fighting, well….it will change your life.
Document your journey. Whether it be a journal, a blog, pictures, videos. Document it. People may ask “why would you want to document this part of your life.” It’s a reminder my friends, a reminder of the battle. Write your child a letter at different times of their treatment so they see the battle in your eyes, as a mom.
There are people that will support you the entire time, and others that just can’t keep up, that are tired of altering their life to accomodate you. Those are the ones who don’t understantd. There is no need for you to explain, so don’t. You have a sick child, there is no explanation needed. Move forward and don’t hate them for it. It’s just a reminder of how difficult this life is and that some people chose to step back when things get to rough.
If you have a spouse, spend time with them alone as much as possible, go out on dates when you are able to and take a nap when the opportunity is there. Don’t complain to much about the little things, it’s not worth it. Pay it forward, there are many, many people that will help you. Some people that you don’t even know.
Swallow your pride and ask for help when needed. Surround yourself with people that understand and know what you are going through. No matter how much others claim to know what you are going through, they don’t. Perhaps they sympathize with us, but they can never empathize.
If the opportunity arises, take sometime for yourself. Even if it’s a ride in the car by yourself, do it. Don’t feel guilty. You are giving 110% of yourself to help save your child. The worrying, anxiety and lack of sleep is overwhelmingly exhausting. If there is anything that has caught me off guard this entire 3 years is the exhaustion that comes with the sleepless nights, the hospitalizations, the worrying, the crying and just the fight.
Regardless of the type of cancer, the battle is long and difficult. Regardless of what others say, this will be a part of your life forever. Once a Cancer Mom, always a Cancer Mom. Hang in there. Keep moving forward. Head up, chin up. #onward
Sincerely,
A Cancer Mom
http://www.chicagonow.com/mary-tyler-mom/2014/09/sams-moms-story-once-a-cancer-mom-always-a-cancer-mom/
